six years of blogging (and how it changed my life)


So I completely forgot that on New Year’s Eve it was my blog’s sixth anniversary!

I have been purposefully absent from blogging this past year; and it was kind of weird. I’ve grown used to blogging about my personal life, about the things I learn as I struggle and grow. However, outside of some purposefully vague blog posts, I’ve been quiet about my life most of this year. I was concentrating on something very important to me and waiting for when I was secure enough to share it.

Well, tonight’s the night and I’m so happy that I waited! Some of you who keep up with me on Instagram or Twitter or Facebook already know what I’m talking about. 😉 But I’m ready to talk about it here. I haven’t planned or outlined any of this post, so hopefully me just explaining what I want to explain all makes sense. XD

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I’ve been building my first romantic relationship, with my best friend James, who lives in Georgia, for the past year.

Yeah; probably not shocking many of you who can read between the lines. XD But hey, this feels very official. XD Some of you who’ve been here awhile know James from his blog; several of you readers kinda grew up with us all together, watching Marvel movies, discussing Star Wars and growing up into college kids–you know who you are. 😉 ❤

Well, James and I met through our blogs back in 2011 and have been friends ever since. About a year ago, after several years of consistently skyping and being the best of friends, our true feelings between us surfaced. I’d had feelings for about six months or so, dropping hints which I thought he was not reading at all. Meanwhile, he’d been holding a crush for about three years (which he hid so well, because I had no idea!) and was absolutely terrified of somehow losing our friendship. So it was quite a big deal when “us” happened; when we began to talk it all out, along with how we could meet.

Our top priority in all of it was protecting our friendship: neither of us wanted to lose what we already had in our friendship. I mean, we loved talking every week about anime, about life, about anything really. Our friendship was too valuable to risk, so we entered the romantic waters very thoughtfully. It was not a walk in the park, people. We both experienced a lot of anxiety and fear during those early months. I was unsure how we could make us work at first, being so far apart and having not met in person, but I knew I wanted to try. I wanted to go slowly and make time for us figure it out, to adapt, to fully comprehend we really did “like like” each other, and spend enough time talking about everything we needed to. And we helped each other through the anxiety, the fear, the trust building!

We talked so much before we first met in May; with all the talking was the trust-building, honesty-building; being respectful, trying to be ourselves, learning more about ourselves as we learned more about what “we” were and could be. We messaged and skyped so much before we met, constantly talking out those fears. It was terrifying and absolutely amazing at the same time. We loved it. It was exciting, it was completely brand new! The butterflies were insane!

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Our first hug at the airport; he barely saw me coming, I was running so fast to reach his arms.

We had a lot of fears before we met, resolving some while I was there, and dealing with others after I went back home. (You can read about our first visit here, if you missed it; it’s tastefully written to exclude we were romantically involved at the time.)

I asked him not to ask me to be his girlfriend during that first visit because I wanted to return home without any ties to see how I felt. I wanted to make sure I loved him, not the idea of him. I wanted to be “just us” for awhile, if that makes sense: just James and Jamie, without any labels like boyfriend and girlfriend.

He very patiently let me take my time. I knew a couple months after coming home that I wanted to officially be together, to try to see if we could make it in the long run. I knew the distance didn’t matter, the distance didn’t effect how I felt. So we privately called each other boyfriend and girlfriend from then on and continued being just us, talking about us, before I returned to him just a few weeks ago.

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From our first official photo session as boyfriend and girlfriend.

He officially asked me to be his girlfriend when I returned, and we made it public on social media to enjoy being a couple without feeling like we had to hide it. (I wanted to take as many cute couple selfies while we were together, after all LOL.) We were both happy and felt safe in own feelings and in each other. We had worked so hard for a year to build us, so it was exciting and still is exciting, to share the fruit of all that work.

We will tell you we’ve already been together more than a year, though: 365 days of very, very hard and dedicated communication being “us”, discussing boundaries, discussing fears, building trust, sharing secrets, discussing fun things like anime as we always had, and figuring out what love was. We’re still doing all that now, really. We’re still learning what love is and becoming closer, stronger.

That’s why for a year I chose to keep us private, so we could grow and become stable without anyone’s input but our immediate circles. I’m so so happy that I chose to be slow and private, even though it meant neglecting my blog for a year. XD

I feel secure and free to talk about it now! Now that such a huge part of my life has received a solid foundation that I’m confident in, I feel like I can come back here (and my other blogs) and talk openly again about life: what I’m learning, what I’m feeling, what I’m doing again. I can refer to James as “boyfriend” on here now; I can be happy knowing that I truly love him very much, without any doubts. That I’m proud to have him as my special someone (and wow, he wins best boyfriend award in the world. How did crazy ol’ me get someone so patient, so empowering, so kind, so affectionate, so gentle, and so supportive? I’m incredibly blessed, you guys!)

So, I’m very excited to come back here, back home to this blog. Back to the place that made us possible.

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Because without starting this blog six years ago, I wouldn’t have met James.

Without this place for us to have gotten to know each other, none of what I just documented would have happened! Like woah…mind blown.

Without writing here, without sharing my fandom joys, my little silly thoughts, my painful life experiences, my personality expressing itself in its whacky funny way, James wouldn’t have wanted to get to know me better! XD We wouldn’t have shared watching the new Marvel movies together; we wouldn’t have commented on each other’s blogs as teenagers for years; he wouldn’t have started his old podcast in 2013 as a way to start skyping with me; we wouldn’t have become the unlikely opposites who get so much out our differences, yet discover so much common ground; we wouldn’t have had each other’s backs during some of the darkest most painful times in both our lives.

Without this blog, I would not have discovered anime, flown across the country twice in a year, discovered myself as I have, experienced the most romantic first kiss one spring morning deep in the south with my hero, best friend, and first love, in the most affectionate, steady, funny, thoughtful, Godly young man ever who shed blood, sweat, utter loyalty and devotion, and a crap ton of being the funniest thing ever, to win my heart. ❤

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I’ve always loved words, telling stories, sharing my struggles and journies in writing. I’ve always believed that words are more powerful than the sword. I’ve believed words were one of the most powerful things in the world. And I’ll always believe that. Because the words in this stupid little blog did so much; it made so much possible. FOR GOODNESS SAKE, someone FELL IN LOVE with my personality, my words, my heart, because of this blog! And right now, despite all the crap that can still hit the fan in my life, I consider myself the most blessed woman in the world.

Your words matter. So when you write, be open, be kind, be true to yourself every single time you share them. You never know what might happen because of it. ❤

~Jamie

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Currently: Baking in the Kitchen


Libelle illustration:

Currently listening: to the One Outs original soundtrack. Stupidly fun to listen, so funky and cheeky. ❤

Currently sitting: at the kitchen table facing into the living room, and moving back and forth with the oven baking chocolate chip banana muffins.

Currently liking: the Grammarly extension for Google Chrome! It’s so much better than the WordPress proofreader–ugh.

Currently drinking: lots of water, still. It’s freaking hot out there and it’s refusing to rain in my neighborhood, so I’m continuing to suffer. Gotta stay hydrated! XD

Currently writing: more often my second blog, Jamie Talks Anime. It feels good to be back! I gave it a new layout too, and for some reason, that’s really brought back my motivation to write again! Feels awesome!

Currently watching: Frasier, on the living room TV:”Ham Radio”, one of my favorite episodes!

Currently obsessed: with my newest third blog, My Soulmate: Music. If you remember in an earlier post I mentioned I wanted to find more ways to better express myself this year? This spontaneously became one of them! I’m posting a favorite song almost every day AND I LOVE IT.

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Currently tired: of politics. Enough. Said.

Currently excited: for my birthday this Sunday! I actually hadn’t thought about it very much this year, but my family and loved ones have been getting excited about it and now I’m excited too!

Currently scaring myself: with finding a job and practicing driving. I’m doing both at the moment. I really hope I have a job by the end of August, I’ll really need it by then. Thankfully, the driving part has been easier than expected. Left turns aren’t that bad, I just learned a trick for parking, and I successfully drove on 7 lane roads for the first time the other day! It will be very interesting when I’m comfortable enough to buy a car and can go where I like. @_@ XD

Currently stuck in my head: so many songs.

Currently wishing: for rain, rain, lots of rain! I WANT IT SO BADLY.

Currently praying: that I continue to be safe while driving, that I find myself the right job, and that the right vehicle will be made available at the right time and place and price.

~Jamie

Where Blogging Brought Me


This was written last week, but its long overdue to be documented on my blog because it’s thanks to blogging that I got to find my very best friend and confident.


Right now, I’m blogging with my very best friend, at the same time! Some of you will recognize him as James from J and J Productions. We’re elbow to elbow at the moment on the couch, both typing up our posts and looking at each other’s screens. XD We’ve been blogging friends for years and even closer best friends for over two and half years, but this is the first time where we’ve actually gotten to simultaneously write blog posts together in the same room in real time, and it’s quite fun. XD

What I’ve decided to blog about is just about us and how we ended up here, because what else should I be writing about? 😉

Once upon a time, five years and seven months ago, 16-year-old me watched a movie called A New Hope and I fell in love with Star Wars. Earlier that same day, I’d literally started this blog. And after watching A New Hope, I wanted blog friends who liked Star Wars too. In that quest, I stumbled over a young blog like mine, run by a boy my age named James, and he loved movies enough to attempt reviewing them. I commented, then he commented back; we followed each other’s blogs. We both loved Star Wars. Tonight, we’re going to watch A New Hope together for the first time, and the last half a decade of our lives will come full circle for me.

Blogging and Star Wars brought us together, but Marvel made us real friends. About four years ago, I saw Captain America: The First Avenger in theaters–it was my first superhero movie–and James wrote to me saying, “hey, glad you liked it! There are more movies you should see before The Avengers comes out!” He wrote blog post after blog post, mostly for me, mentoring me in characters and films and our friendship really solidified. After the Avengers came out, we skyped every time a new Marvel film was released just to rave and hype about them.

Last week, we saw Captain America: Civil War together in 3D. THAT was surreal. That movie was like the climax of a very grand adventure that for the two of us had shared for years. We clutched hands in gasps and jumped in unison, and spazzed in hype at character introductions. I cried over a certain funeral scene and he squeezed my fingers to let me know he felt it too. We both shrieked with laughter. It was the first new Marvel movie that we did not have to message each other to say, “I’VE SEEN IT. TELL ME WHEN YOU DO SO WE CAN TALK SPOILERS.” We finally saw a Marvel movie right. XD

Marvel made us real friends, but anime made us pretty much inseparable in 2014. We skyped every week to discuss new anime episodes and that was the platform that helped us become the best of friends. Anime, which so rich in life and emotion and fantastic storytelling, gave us so many avenues to connect and discuss ethics and beliefs and our own lives. We built trust and solid communication skills as we spent time together goofing off and enjoying conversation. Over the last two years, we were especially able to be there for each other when life got rough on the other. And finally about seven months ago we decided enough was enough, and began to plan how we could meet in person.

This past week, after five years of blog comments, movie and anime rants, and 10,000 skype calls, I’ve flown to Georgia so I can see my very best friend in person instead off of a screen. After an early morning rise, a three hour flight and turbulence, we met in the Atlanta airport and it was incredibly surreal. We were both in Star Wars shirts and I almost knocked him over hugging him the moment I saw him. 😀

I think we felt like us by the time we were dragging my 49 pound suitcase to the car. I pushed it on its rollers up the ramp while insisting I was as strong as Thor and could handle it, through huffs and giggles. He scrambled behind me pointing me in the direction we needed to go and freaking out that I was going to trip and tumble over the suitcase. I got to the car and exclaimed, “It’s humid” and he grinned, rolled his eyes and said, “Yep!” It was hysterical. XD

The trip so far has been amazing and I’ve felt so at home. I was made welcome by his family immediately too. When we reached his home, his grandmother was standing there with open arms almost as soon as I was out of the car, and everyone is all smiles and making sure I’m comfortable. By day two, everyone said it felt I’d always been there. It feels amazing to fit in so well! ❤

I love being here with my best friend. We hug a lot; we can’t believe the other is real. I’ve never been so grateful to be with someone in the flesh. We spent the first days marveling how the other looked in 3D instead of 2D on a screen. XD And awesomely, we get along better than we’d hoped in person! He’s less smug XD and apparently, I’m more sweet in person. XD We’ve already watched a lot of anime in person, and of course seeing a Marvel movie together just put us on cloud nine.

I’d singing his praises, but this post is already incredibly long, so I’ll save that for another day. ❤

I can’t wait to spend the next few days with this guy. I’ll blog more when I come home, but for now I best enjoy where it’s brought me so far. 😉 ❤

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my favorite picture of us, taken directly after the end of watching Star Wars: A New Hope.

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I’m home now and I’m getting ready to publish this. I will write more about my visit another day, but for now, this is where blogging for the past five years has brought me. It blows my mind at the opportunities that God has allowed me to have. I’m incredibly thankful to be able to visit my best friend at all, all the way from Arizona to Georgia. And we just had to blog at least once together, because hey, so much can happen just from blogging. 😉

~Jamie

5 Years Today


5 years today, I was 15 and I wanted my own blog. 5 years today I started one–this one–and in many ways, my life today is drastically different because of it. That first year of blogging was mostly me feverishly posting about Star Wars, sharing family photos, doing tags, and exploring other blogs run by kids my age with similar interests. That year grew into two, then three, as I loved it so much that I just kept writing.

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It’s year 5 tonight! I’m 21 now. Today, I’m still blogging because I still love it and I still have things I want to say and people I talk to. I actually have two blogs now because I love it so much.

I’m thankful that I’ve had a place to process my thoughts, review entertainment, be my odd self, and share my passions for self-discovery these past 5 years. Being a writer, blogging has given me a relaxed place to grow and practice. I’ve found my inner voice by blogging, along with my natural voice.

Best of all, this blog has been a platform to meet many wonderful people who’ve helped me grow in many ways. Though people have come and gone, I’m still in contact with many wonderful people, and have developed amazing relationships from a select few that I met when I was 15! If it wasn’t for this blog, I would not know my very best friend and would have missed five years of enthusiastic comment conversations, blog/podcast collaborating, and a million happy Skype conversations about anime and life and everything in-between.

All because 5 years ago today, I created a WordPress blog, called it “Through Two Blue Eyes”, and fell in love with writing to all of you.

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Truly, meeting so many of you wonderful people have made this blogging experience entirely worth it, even though I love talking to you all anyway. XD It blows my mind, guys, how much starting this blog has changed me! I’m incredibly grateful for the last five years of writing and all the bridges it created to bring blessings into my life. I hope to be here for many more years to come! ❤

So, happy anniversary to me! *climbs out of “super-reflective mode” to release 500 rainbow balloons and then chokes on a cloud of glitter. XD *

~Jamie

For My Fellow Writers /// 02


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NaNoWriMo begins in just a couple days guys. Yikes. At this point I’m pretty positive that I won’t be able to join this year *cries into college notebook* BUT that’s not going to stop me from writing on my own schedule. XD Today’s link is specifically geared towards NaNoWriMo participates, but all writers should check this out!

I was browsing (don’t ask for the story, it’s too long) when I stumbled over this post featuring amazing links for resources and blog posts by a fellow writer; it was just too rich not to share with you all! The post is called “2015 NaNoWriMo Masterpost Link Up | With A Free Printable!” and can be found on the blog Raychel Rose. 🙂 I just started following her blog!

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While there are too many resources here to read all together in a day, I would highly suggest scrolling over the list and opening whatever might jump out at you. There’s so much good stuff, hopefully you all can find something to give you that boost right before the big first day of NaNo is here! ❤

One I really liked was “My Online Tools for NaNoWriMo”. My kind of post! 😀

If you find a great post in your browsing, be awesome and share it with me! ❤ XD

~Jamie