Open Letters and Lyrics to the Men Who Influenced My Life

I originally posted this on my quiet music blog, but I was told I needed to share it here too and I agree. ❤ I hope the music can touch you too. ❤

These are open letters (certain identities hidden for privacy) to four men who’ve affected my life in ways that have shaped me into who I am today. I say goodbye, I say I miss you, and I say I love you. I’ve had these words and lyrics on my heart for a long time…it felt good to express like this.

{For The Childhood Best Friend}

Dear B,

You were my first best friend, my playpen buddy, my childhood friend, the one I always knew would be my partner in crime in all our games. You were one of the best parts of my whole kid world. You’ve inspired some of my best fictional characters by leaving such an impression of the ideal childhood friend. I’m sorry our families fell apart like they did; I’m sorry we drifted. But thank you for being a part of what gave me a happy childhood. You will always be my first best friend. ❤ This song makes me think of you and miss you as we leave childhood behind us. Thank you for all the memories, and I wish you the greatest luck in your future. I’ll always be in your corner, ok? ❤

So Long by Zooey Deschanel.
“Hate to say goodbye, goodbye and I hate to see the end, the end.
‘Cause it’s been so long since I’ve made a friend like you.”

{For The Friend Who Disappeared}

Dear D,

When my whole world was crashing, you entered my life…you were like a life preserver…you noticed me, wanted to be my friend, entered worlds with me, made me laugh and forget my pain, my depression, my fear. I liked you. I’m sorry our families fell apart….I’m so sorry that I lost contact with you. I’m so sorry that you never came to see me, that you never responded to my note, that I’m not yet brave enough to come find you myself to say thank you and goodbye. While things have worked out in my life, I still consider you disappearing from my life as one of my biggest regrets and personal losses. I grieved your loss to this song for years: I listened to its chorus a thousand times because it matched how my heart hurt, and sometimes still does. I do thank you for being the friend I so desperately needed at that time in my life, for helping me feel special; I miss you when I see Willy Wonka, vampires, and Sherlock Holmes. You deserve the best of luck, wherever you are. Just please don’t live in fear for the rest of your life, ok? Please don’t live in fear.

Habits by Tove Lo.
“You’re gone and I gotta stay high all the time to keep you off my mind ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh.
High all the time to keep you off my mind, ooh-oh, ooh-ooh.
Spending my days locked in a haze, trying to forget you, babe, I fall back down.
Gotta stay high all my life to forget I’m missing you, ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh.”

{For The Unsafe Father}

Dear Dad,

I really miss you: the you I thought I knew when I was a little girl. I’m sad that you didn’t want me to become my own person, that you believed I didn’t have a mind of my own, that you couldn’t just love me enough to let me be free. But I’m not sorry I don’t see you anymore. You played too many mind games, your words never added up, you made me feel like dirt. I won’t accept being treated that way again for the rest of my life. I do hope you will change one day. This song has been my anthem of freedom from your treatment since I first heard it, because even though you kept me down for a long time, I’m standing up now. I’m becoming that ball of fire again, and I’m finding emotional and mental freedom and happiness.

Roar by Katy Perry.
“You held me down but I got up, already brushing off the dust.
You hear my voice, you hear that sound like thunder gonna shake the ground.
You held me down, but I got up, get ready ’cause I”ve had enough.
I see it all, I see it now; I’ve got the eye of the tiger, the fighter, dancing through the fire, cause I am a champion and you’re going to hear my roar louder, louder than a  lion ’cause I am a champion, and you’re going to hear me roar.”

{For The One I Love, the One Who is There}

Dear James,

You’re incredible. You’re the man who loved me for three years and was too scared to tell me for fear of losing our friendship…the man who has given his everything to win my heart, to be there for me…. You are the one who helped me grow despite my hurts; who helped me feel safe; who made me feel funny and happy; who told me I was gorgeous the way I was, to embrace my flaws; who told me I had a voice, that I had value, that I was worth more than gold…. thank you. Thank you for over a year of dedication as my romantic partner and for five whole years of being there. For just not leaving or disappearing like everyone else has. Thank you for loving me so unconditionally and for telling me you’ll always be there. Thank you. I have a dozen romantic songs that make me think of you, but you are more than just my boyfriend; you are my best friend, the seashore to my rocky waves, my home and happy place, my joy. I am full of gratitude for you and for everything you’ve given me. This song is my heart to you; because every lyric rings true. Thank you for changing my life for the better and I love you! ❤

Thank You by MoZella.
“Mixed up and lost, you showed me love at no cost, and when nobody else cared you were there….

Down on my luck, you helped my life get unstuck and when the world went away, you stayed…
Thank you for the good times, thank you for your love, thank you for the joy you’ve given me…
You fight off my enemies, you’d take a bullet for me, and you know I’d do the same for you…
‘Cause that’s how we roll, connected at the soul, and I just want you to know how I feel…
Thank you for loving me every day, thank you for showing me the way, thank you for things I never say…
Thank you.”

Dear Men,

You have changed me, shaped me, and influenced my life in so many positive and negative ways, but you have helped me develop into a better person; you have made me feel loss to appreciate love and loyalty when I truly recognize it; you have given me the sweetest memories and most bitter tears. You have even helped me become a better person. Thank you for that. None of it was in vain. I won’t forget any of you… don’t you forget me either.

Don’t You by Simple Minds.
“Won’t you come see about me? I’ll be alone, dancing, you know it, baby.

Tell me your troubles and doubts, giving me everything inside and out, and love’s strange so real in the dark.
Think of the tender things that we were working on.
Slow change may pull us apart, when the light gets into your heart, baby.
Don’t you… forget about me… don’t don’t don’t don’t, don’t you… forget about me.”

Sincerely, your old friend, your daughter, you girlfriend and future,
Jamie ❤

19 thoughts on “Open Letters and Lyrics to the Men Who Influenced My Life

  1. Why don’t you take down that awful comment about your father!! The MAN in your life that took care of you, raised you to be Godly, worked hard his WHOLE life for his family, bought the house you live in and everything that is in it, then hands it over to your mother, so his family can continue to have a home. Why don’t you talk to your mom about the decisions on how you were raised! Choices were made by and agreed on by BOTH your parents! Where’s HER blame, Oh that’s right, you were a poor victim of abuse!! What a joke!! You HAD a great father, a great role model, a great provider and someone who still loves you very much!! Just because your mom fell out of love with him, and (everyone knows what he did) it doesn’t make him the devil and it doesn’t give YOU the RIGHT to dump on him. And since you are very immature in your actions and thoughts some advice you need to learn, simply, nobody is perfect. Your dad is an honorable person! You WERE VERY FORTUNATE to of HAD HIM AS A FATHER!
    You, your sister and your mother have come close to destroying this man, hope that makes you all sleep good at night! Go ahead and delete my comment,

    Talk about him again and I will make sure everyone gets both sides of the story!

    1. It’s Funny How no Matter what you go through some people will never be satisfied with what you have to say or the struggles of your life… there struggles will always be worse or more important (at least to them) …. so whoever you are that commented your opioin about Jamie’s Father, You don’t know, and you will NEVER know her struggle or What she has been through…and youre pretty much the most selfish piece of trash on this planet because of the way you think youre opinion or comment will matter to her or to anyone for that matter…. no one cares that you think she should blame her mother? how’s that gona help her grow, by transferring blame to someone else? no the Blame is directly given to who it is due and that’s something Jamie will always have over you is the patients and understanding to know where she has come from and to rise above petty and childish people like you who would rather sit behind a screen and make threats and bring people down then actually do something desent with there own life. I’ll be praying that one day you’ll realize the damage you try to afflict on people is probably from low self worth and I hope you move past that and have a better life in the future and you don’t continue down the path your on now…. Because it’s a sad, lonely and pathetic one.

      1. To Bee: Your comment meant the world to me!! Thank you for saying things for me, you took some words right out of my mouth. Your support means so much, thank you for standing up for me like you did. ❤ I love you! ❤

    2. To Good Father:
      I refuse to respond to most of the content in this first comment because A) it is very vicious and disrespectful, leaving no room for mutual engagement in conversation: B) you are using a pseudonym and vague email to hide your identity, which shows how cowardly and frightened you are that I might know who you are: and C) you threaten me and use certain phrases that lead me to believe that I was really going to delete this email and allow you to spew a hateful rant that nobody would see it. Plainly: I refuse to hide your behavior, have published this comment, and have shared screenshots of your comment on most of my social media sites for lots people to see how you’ve spoken to me.

      Until I know who you truly are, I will not be following you down any of your rabbit trails, which have absolutely nothing to do with my purely honest letter about how I feel. I have a right to my feelings and my life story. And honestly, nobody but my own father or someone very close to his side of the story would get so upset to rant defensively like you have. I don’t know for sure who you are, but you have done a poor job at making my father appear in any good light, in fact you have done the opposite, to not only me but now to many of my friends on Facebook and Twitter.

      To anyone else reading this: emotional, verbal, and spiritual abuse are real problems, this comment above an excellent demonstration of cyberbullying and verbal abuse in fact: expose it when you see it as I have, so people can be aware that it can happen to anyone and can cause real mental and even physical harm due to stress. Don’t take it, bring your friends and family close to you for support, and take the higher ground.

      I will not be engaging anymore with this commentor until I learn a real name; and anything more they submit I will be documenting, tracking, and sharing for my own safety. I want you all to know that, whether this is the last of them or not.


    3. Hello,

      I don’t know you–commentor who obviously has no life. I don’t know your connection to Jamie’s father–but by the tone of this comment I’m pretty sure I can guess it. I don’t know why you think that attacking a 23 year old woman is a good idea…but hello all the same. Hello person who thinks that threatening a young girl is a good idea, hello person who’s life is probably as meaningful as the brown tip at the end of a banana–you know, the thing that is DISGUSTING and that NOBODY WANTS. I introduce myself to you.
      I am Jamie’s friend. I am the woman who WATCHED as this dangerous, dirt bag, man abused her and her family. I am the friend who helped her, who loved her, who lifted her up in that awful time. And I’m not the only one, there are many of us. We all watched what “your man” did to his daughter. We all saw the way he treated her, her sister, her mom, and her brother. We all saw it, and wept with her. We rejoiced when he was FINALLY removed from her life. Why? Because he, like you, is the tip of the banana. The garbage juice that slips out of the bag. He, like you, is even less than a rat. At least rats provide a service to the world–you and “your man, boo, bae, honey pot, sweet baby boy,” your “whatever” don’t even provide the world with as much service as a rat.
      But oh you got to defend your “man” on his daughter’s blog. Oh yes feel proud that you defended an abusive monster. Feel proud–just as Eva did all those years shacking up with Adolf. Feel proud just as the countless women felt proud as they lay with Castro. Feel proud just as those who do yoga poses on Holocaust graves do. Feel proud. Feel excited about yourself because you stood up for “both sides of the story”….never mind the fact you were so cowardly that A. you had to be anon and B. you can even respond to anyone responding to you.
      But feel proud Eva,
      Feel proud.
      You stood up for a “good man”.
      So while your Adolf prances off to ruin other lives, curl back up into your banana peel and feel proud. You deserved it.
      But understand this.
      You are worthless.
      Your comment is worthless.
      You are garbage juice.
      And you will NOT touch my friend.

  2. I know I commented on your music blog version of this post, Jamie, but I just wanted to say right here out in the open how deeply I respect and admire you for this entire post–but especially for the one to your father. It’s bold, firm, honest, but so gracious.

    I, on the other hand, am not so kind, especially to bullies. To that coward who left that venomous comment up there, puttering away at your keyboard behind the pompous name of “Good Father” and threatening a young woman behind the comfort of your laptop? I hope your conscience eats you alive for coming on here and talking to her in such a vicious way, and I’m gonna take the liberty of informing you, too, that Jamie has an army of friends on this blog who have her back, and they will rip your comments to shreds if you EVER come back on here to threaten her.

    1. Oh Maribeth I love you so much!! ❤ Thank you for all your support you've always given me over the years!! ❤

      And thank you so so much for standing up for me here; it meant the world to me! Thank you for being unafraid to stand by me! ❤ I knew to run right to you and all the other girls when this comment appeared and you all blew me away with your support and validation! Thank you for everything you wrote, I appreciate it! ❤


      1. You are so welcome, girl. That guy is a coward, he needed and *deserved* to be exposed, and you’ve proven by your response that you have more courage in your little finger than he has in his whole body. I love you so much–we all do–and we have your back 100%.

  3. To anyone else reading this: emotional, verbal, and spiritual abuse are real problems, this comment above an excellent demonstration of cyberbullying and verbal abuse!

    You consider someone saying ,”to not say rude comments about your father on the internet” is cyber bullying (it’s two words, not one) verbal abuse, SPIRITUAL ABUSE? I was defending your dad, sorry if that offended you and your “computer friends” who are not much better than you, with their threatening and vicious comments.

    Oh, FYI your family is wrong about “it being your dad” that wrote the comment. He doesn’t read your blogs, and would never said anything derogatory about his daughters (especially on the internet). He doesn’t even know I wrote it.

    I won’t comment on your site anymore, unless, of course, you insult your father!

    Your 22, living at home, can’t drive, working at Dairy Queen, and has a BF in Georgia. You got it all figured out.

    Tell your sister, congratulations on her marriage to a women.

    1. HI!!! I’m a computer friend, and OMG I find it so funny that you comment saying “Wah wah I’m not cyber bullying you” when A. you just posted a long rant about how worthless Jamie’s life is, B. said her online friend were worthless, C. stood up for someone who bullied her, and D. just did a little homophobic jig at the end of your post. You are the reason that I have a headache–I slammed my head so hard against my laptop laughing at your stupidity. Lets take a look at your life shall we?
      A. You are a homophobic dirt bag who comments on young women’s blogs trying to get attention into your worthless life.
      B. You THREATEN young women
      C. You are so cowardly you can’t even post without your precious anon filter
      D. You have your life figured out…because…being a cyber bully to a 22 year old is a sign (other than being a possibly rapist, pedophile, or drug dealer) that you have your life together.
      E. You have to act like a child–and a 22 year old woman is responding better than you are.

      Shall we go on?
      I truly feel sorry for you.

      Must be fun to be so awful.

      1. Rebecca Blount , you are a mean spirited little girl. I’ll be sure to forward your “communications” to
        Cumulus Broadcasting Savannah.

        I’ve am none of the things you’ve accused me of , I don’t appreciated your defamatory remarks ! I will pursue this .

        PS. If you want to be in journalism , get your facts before spewing your mouth !

  4. Oh trust me, like my boss cares. And you are so cute when you use “Big Boy” threats. Besides, all I have to do is explain your behavior and everyone will laugh. Trust me honey, I’ve had worse thrown at me, I’ve been the victim of abuse, I’ve seen what your kind does, I’ve had enemies call my work, I’ve had my enemies attempt to get my fired. But hi still here. What are you going to do? Threatening me now huh? Oh well, I can file this under harrassment and stalking. OOoooooh a woman can pull that card? Yes she can. Your comment is perfect evidence for a stalking and harrasment claim. Have fun persuing this, if you dare. And oh look at you thinking I’m a journalist!! ahahahahah wrong. Ever consider that threatening young women on Facebook, blogs, and so on is not a good idea??? Like really, did you just sit on my blog that i used for school when I was 18 and try to find a way to hurt me?? So brave. So heroic. Eva you have taken the cake. Like my work is going to care if a STALKER called to leave nasty comments. So what if anyone is going to CARE if some crazy person left a nasty remark about me. No one is even going to care what I say about any issue. The world is filled with hungry starving people, people hurting from evil people–no one cares about you or your words. Now, if you want to continue stalking me, I’m 22, yes I’m a woman (probably why you thought it okay to stalk me) who works in Savannah but not where you think I do. You can continue to leave nasty and threatening comments, and I can continue to file them into the stalker page (PS I already took down one stalker). Want my phone number so you can make your threats to my face? Wanna blow up my email? The more the merrier.

      1. Like really, please. Call my work, want my number? Want my office number? Want my email? Want my social media addresses? I’d LOVE some extra money, I’m looking at buying a lovely little house…I’d love to have someone generously donate to my cause by sending me threats! I’d love to write a whole blog about how my best friend’s creepy and abusive daddy stalked me and caused me to have problems. Want my number big boy?

It always makes my day to see your messages! Don't forget to check back, I try to write back to you too! <3

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