what runs through my mind at 8 AM when I walk the neighbor dogs:


tumblr_mh0bofJKrz1rqmuhto1_500*opens gate*

Let’s go for our walk!

Woah, Tinkie, woah!

You don’t know stop, but you do know whoa like a horse. Why.

Let’s look both ways before we cross the street, guys!

CAR.

Oh wait it’s not moving. It’s in park. Why do I always think the neighbor’s car is coming down the street? EVERY TIME.

Tinkie please don’t pull me across the street!

*shuffles sandals to half-jog across the street to hang onto two 80 lb dogs*

*gets leashes adjusted just right*

Time to get out my tunes!

Darn you earbuds. 

EVERY DARN TIME.

Clarence don’t pee on the neighbor’s new tree!

*finally gets earbuds plugged into MP3 player*

Finally, some tunes!

*instantly looks around to be completely aware of all traffic* Because I’m responsible for you guys!

*quiet*

Oh no, I completely forgot to reread that one blog post before scheduling it. Now people will grammar nazi that post and I’ll look like an amateur. Course I remember now when I can’t do anything about it, lolol.

*pretends to flip off the annoying, snarling neighbor dog who always throws a fit when he sees us pass by*

*quiet*

Good girl. Good boy. Let’s cross the street.

Let’s see how far I can get without Clarence pooping on me.

OMG I LOVE THIS SONG.

This is totally the trailer song I’m going to use for when my book series becomes a tv show.

I CAN PRACTICALLY SEE MY CHARACTERS.

What are you doing back there, Clarence?

DANG IT, CLARENCE.

And always in front of the really nice house too.

*quickly looks around while I pick up dog poop*

Of course here comes someone to throw out their trash, and a car is coming, and here comes three school children. This is just superb timing.

DEAR GOD THAT CAR IS COMING FOR THIS HOUSE WE NEED TO GET OUT OF HERE.

SO EMBARRASSING.

BY THE WAY YOU’RE WELCOME.

Tinkie stop smelling that plant we gotta keep moving!

*scrambles along with a bag of poop and tangled leashes*

*quiet*

I’m tired of this song. Next!

I hate walking past this house and their obnoxiously awesome mini monster truck. And their dogs used to never be kept behind the fence! 

HAVEN’T YOU EVER HEARD OF KEEPING YOUR DOGS OUT OF THE DANGEROUS STREET, PEOPLE. Poor doggies.

It is funny to see the kids trying to get up in the truck to go to school. lololol

Clarence isn’t your bladder empty by now?

Oooh, new song.

*inward gasp*

I’M SO SORRY, MAIN CHARACTER, THAT YOUR THEME IS SO TORTUROUS AND ANGRY BUT IT IS PERFECT FOR THAT FOUR YEAR GAP I CAN’T WRITE. GAAAAH.

Oh, hello Rose! *waves*

*quiet*

Good girl, good boy. You guys are doing so good! Tinkie you’re so cute today!! You’re eyes are so pretty!

Clarence stop walking in front of me! I will trip over you!

*suspiciously stares at workmen and workmen’s truck across the street*

After all. You could be KIDNAPPERS… or MURDERERS in DISGUISE for all I know.

God I should stop rewatching Scream at night when I’m alone.

Yeah. That’s not doing me any favors.

Tinkie please don’t eat that feather. Gross.

*Rounds corner and navigates around prompt traffic*

Thank God today wasn’t one of those poop-across-the-street days, huh, Clarence?!

*quiet*

Aw, I love this song but I won’t hear the end of it by the time we’re done.

Come on, guys. Let’s go home. Let’s go home.

*quiet*

Hold on, Tinkie, we need to stop at the trash to throw away Clarence’s package.

Tinkie please, just five steps over so I can lift the lid!

PLEASE TINKIE!!!

Okay, okay, we can go into the yard now.

Good girl. Good boy. I love you!

*lets them inside, closes gate, and tries to squeeze in that 30 seconds of song left into the fifteen second walk home across street.*

Oooh, I showed really go edit that post now. But first, breakfast!

~Jamie


This is a follow up post for that incredibly ancient one of about two years ago, from when I was scorpion hunting. Some of you will actually remember that one. 😉

Oh, before you leave, if you’ve seen Age of Ultron, you should listen to my latest podcast with James the Reviewer! We discuss our thoughts on the characters different elements of the film. Here is Part 1 on YouTube! 🙂 (Careful, here lurk spoilers!)

 

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6 thoughts on “what runs through my mind at 8 AM when I walk the neighbor dogs:

  1. Wonderful walk…I could feel myself sprinting along with you dying to know what you were seeing and hearing. I’ve never had a dog to walk but I feel like I’ve just been there with you…hoping to hear what you are thinking when you’re hearding the cats. Lol. Great job…really enjoyed it.

    1. I’m so glad you enjoyed this one, Aunt Erin! I’ll have to take pictures during a walk some time to send in an email for you…if I can juggle my the iPod touch camera and the dogs at the same time. XD

It always makes my day to see your messages! Don't forget to check back, I try to write back to you too! <3

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