Hey, guys, today I wanted to ask for your prayers.
Basically, stress levels are pretty much the same at about the time I did that first post letting you guys know what was going on with my family. To put things as delicately as possible, the source of stress is still living under the same roof, waters are still being stirred, wounds are still being added on top of old wounds that haven’t had time to get better. To heal, I and nearly everyone else needs seperation. So, I’ve been hiding out in my room in the evening (along with my sister) with movies and tv shows and books and music.
And this has been going on for over four weeks. And I feel numb. I feel like I’ve been in limbo for way too long (heck, I’ve been in limbo for almost two years already). I’m tired of trying to dull away my hurt; I seriously need seperation to begin any sort of healing process. However, as of right now, I don’t see that happening for another month at least. I really hope that won’t be too late. I can’t stay frozen like this forever.
I really need your prayers so that I can stay strong for a little longer. I can’t afford to have a mental or emotional breakdown right now. But I’m tired of trying to bottle my feelings up inside of me, of ignoring how I feel. I’m tired of distracting myself. I need to heal. If you could pray that the source of distress and harm would be removed from my home so that a time of healing for both myself and my mom and sister can begin, that would be much appreciated.
I want to grow, I want to heal, I want to move on as soon as possible. I want to learn from this devasting experience.
It’s just hard to do that when I feel numb.