I'm not waiting for a Prince Charming . . .

DO NOT BE ALARMED! This will all pan out in a couple of minutes. Keep reading. Like, maybe scroll.

There is something I see often when looking for blogs run by girls who are a lot like myself. I find a variety of Christian girls out there; some who are just as deep in the ‘Christian Radicalism’ section as my family is (they are actually rare), and some whom you wouldn’t really guess they are Christian till they mention how lost they would feel if they didn’t have Christ. But there is a common theme on the sidebars of these blogs which I have noticed. . . .

They almost all have a widget that says something much like “I am waiting for Prince Charming”.

Now, sometimes these widgets are worded exactly as above and sometimes it’s changed a bit. But almost always, there’s something about waiting. Often times the text is coupled with a picture of a lady from Lord of the Rings (this is a large theme) (sorry, I don’t know the lady’s name. Ain’t watched Lord of the Rings) or something similar.

Waiting is a good thing. I would advocate that all young ladies should strive to save themselves for their future husbands.

The thing that ticks me off is the ‘Prince Charming’ part.

In many of the romances (and I’ve not seen many, only read about them, or pasted them together from lots of scattered information), I have noticed the story lines follow the young lady who wants to fall in love with someone who will love them back. Often by the end of the film, this is how it turns out. The problem is, the young men that come along are simply perfect for these girls. What’s wrong with that? Simply this : man was not made for woman. The name ‘Prince Charming’ rings in my mind a feminized sort of man. Hmm, sounds like someone who’s main purpose is to make me (or the lady in the film) completely happy. But that’s not how it should be. Woman was made from man, was brought to man and was made for man. Look it up. It’s in Genesis.

So, I do not really want to refer to my future someone as ‘Prince Charming’. I was made for him not him for me. His main purpose is not to be charming, brilliant or chivalrous to us (though these are all fine qualities that would go along nicely on a side dish). His main purpose is to glorify God. His main purpose is to take dominion over the earth. His main purpose is to be a courageous warrior in the fight between good and evil. Our job is to help them do those things! I believe we will be better prepared to help them if we think of ourselves as future helpmates not future princesses.

DISCLAIMER. I am not saying that anyone who says, “I am waiting for Prince Charming’ is meaning that they are waiting for someone to come sweep them up in whirls of fluff. I am not saying that anyone who says “I am waiting for Prince Charming” is meaning to say that they are expecting a perfect someone for themselves.  Thinking it over, I am sure that many young ladies are simply used to thinking of their future someone under the name tag ‘Prince Charming’ because ‘charming’ takes the place of the name you don’t know. However, I think I have a better name we can give our warriors of Christ (they won’t be Disney guys for sure) (sorry, guys. No Flynn Rider. Besides. He’s Rapunzle’s man).

The man I want to marry is the one described above (not the last paragraph, but the one above that one). While I could still call him Prince Charming, I think a more suitable name is required to shift my focus from the thought of him being here for me to him being here for God (and me being for both of them!). Therefore, I decided that I would like to refer to my future someone as Prince Courage. See? I kept the ‘C’. *grins*

To anyone who reads this (whether in the week I’ve published this or years later) and would like to call their future someone as Prince Courage, feel as free as a wild songbird to use my new coined name (just don’t brag that you were the one that coined it!). While I do not expect to be seeing “I am waiting for Prince Courage” to suddenly spread to the many blogs out there, I do hope that whoever has read and agreed with this would feel free to use this name on their blog sidebar, just like I am going to do! (but find your own picture, please! I know, I am so stingy, aren’t I?!)

My Prince Courage Symbol

(By the way, I just realized this post is in perfect time for the month of romance) (Or waiting for romance, for some of us!)

~Jamie Joyce

NOTE: This does not really apply directly to my topic of calling my man ‘Prince Courage’ it does apply to the fictional, *for woman* ‘Prince Charming’. I wanted to include this section that I wrote out in my first draft for the warning or blessing of others.  Read below.

I almost want to say that watching romances is not dangerous or something to worry about, but from what I have seen, watching too many or too often can stir up wrong thoughts or ideas of future love and relationship with your future husband. I can’t keep count of how many times I read things about ‘Mr Darcy’ or one of the Narnia men or other men who are fictional. These men may be very wonderful in moral character (or just plain, down right handsome), but thinking “my man must be like him” is asking for trouble. Men of reality can not be as perfect as those in the world of cinema and if I put standards of fictional men on reality, I will come up with an empty net. (I can’t help but think of how many woman have become disappointed in real men after becoming brainwashed with the Twilight series).

I am not saying that seeing one of these different films every once in a while is wrong. I enjoy watching ‘The Music Man’ with the dashing Harold Hill with his wonderful grin and song and dance, or see the happy-go-lucky Errol Flynn swashbuckling on sea ships or in castles. And *cough* Han Solo shooting his blaster and going on awesome adventures with Chewie on the Millennium Falcon. A little once in a while can be enjoyable (as I quickly think  Anne Shirley and Gilbert Blythe, Robin Hood and Marian or Belle and the Beast). But too much can either tint your view of romance or tint the way you want to see your future someone. So, I recommend going as light on the romance or thinking of male actors as much as possible; for the sake of both mental and emotional purity.

Please do not take this wrong; I am only writing from the stand point of someone who has seen the results of dwelling on fictional men or romance for too long. Too much can replace our Prince Courage with someone whom we could never marry in a life time. That is a good thing. Because we would be miserable if we all did. We will never have a Mister Perfect from our standards. We will only be happy with the one whom the Lord has picked for us. As Reb Tevye reasoned in ‘Fiddler on the Roof’, “Did Adam and Eve have a matchmaker? Ah, they did. And it appears these two have the same Matchmaker.” So, until your match comes by, keep thy heart under lock and key and don’t give it away before it’s time, whether to movie men or misconceived thoughts of romance. 

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